Mid-Thirties Slightly Hot Mess Female Seeking Billionaire Epilogue

Epilogue

Dear Diary, 

You would think I’d be much more sane now that I’m in love and have a boyfriend.

I have a boyfriend. A really good-looking boyfriend. Yes, I just sang that out loud.

So yes, now that I am loved up, you would think that I’m less of a hot mess. The fact is that you can’t change a leopard’s spots in one day or maybe ever.

You will not believe what happened to me, or maybe you will. I mean, as my luck goes, if it’s going to be disastrous, it will probably happen to me. All I will say is, if you think you’re going to have a little bit of kinky fun with some fuzzy handcuffs and you’re not 100% sure how they work, maybe think again.

I’m sure your mind must be buzzing in wonder. I’m sure you’re thinking to yourself, “I’m not someone that would ever mess with fuzzy handcuffs.” And normally I would say I wasn’t that type of person either, but when your hot boyfriend asks you if you want to role play and he agrees to pretend to be a cop, well, then you might say yes to the handcuffs, but I digress. I’ll tell you more later. 

Love, sexy and silly, Sarah.

“So, darling, I want to ask you something.” Ethan looks at me over the top of his newspaper, and I stare at him as I eat my cereal. I still can’t believe that this gorgeous man is mine.

“What do you want to ask me?” I say as I grab my freshly squeezed orange juice and quickly sip. “Wait, don’t tell me that you want me to experiment again?” I wrinkle my nose as I put my glass back down.

“What do you mean by experiment again?” He asks, putting the newspaper down on the table and leaning forward. His blue eyes are alight with mischief and glee, and I glare at him.

“You know what I’m talking about.”

“Please explain it for me,” he says looking confused, and I know he’s about to start laughing. Ethan Rosser would never make it as an actor.

“I’m not going to explain it to you,” I say. “Let’s just say, when I agreed to experiment with you back there, I didn’t think it would feel like that.”

“Okay,” he says, raising an eyebrow. “How did you think it was going to feel?”

“Well, I mean,” I pause and look away from him. “Maybe it’s not about how it felt but what happened.” I shudder at the memory. I fear embarrassment may make me burn up in flames.

He chuckles and I glare at him. “It’s not funny, Ethan.”

“Hey, it happens,” he says, shrugging. “I didn’t know that you didn’t know that. I wasn’t grossed out.” I press my lips together as he winks at me.

“How was I supposed to know that that would happen when you asked me to do anal?”

“Hey, you’re the one that said you wanted to experiment.”

“Yeah, because I trusted you and I …”

“Do you no longer trust me?” he asks, his eyes wide and sad as he frowns. I wonder if he’s really worried or not.

“You know I trust you, I just …” I wrinkle my nose. “It was disgusting.”

“It’s fine. We went in the shower. We cleaned up.”

“Yeah, but, I mean …” I sigh. “Anyway, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Hey, it’s okay, Sarah. I love you. And so you kind of did a little number two as I was …”

“Ethan,” I stand up and hold my hand up. “I will leave your apartment right now and go home if we continue this conversation.”

“It’s fine,” he says, jumping up and grabbing me by the hands and pulling me into his arms. “That’s the sort of stuff that happens when you experiment.”

“Yeah well I don’t want it to happen again.” I sigh.

“Well, I guess I took your anal cherry already.” He smirks and I blush as he runs his fingers down my face.

“Yeah, I guess you did, and as far as I’m concerned, I’m not interested in doing it again.”

“Because it didn’t feel good,” he kisses me and then pulls back. “Or because of the shit?”

“Ethan,” I shout at him, groaning. I am mortified at the events that occurred when I let him take me in the ass. I had no idea that certain things would come out of me during the act, and I never wanted to discuss them again.

“Anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about.”

“Then what did you want to talk about?” I ask him as I head back to the table. I’m still hungry and love being at Ethan’s place because he always has a fully stocked fridge. Even though I got a pay rise, I still feel cheap. I don’t buy everything I want because I still have to repay my student loans. When Ethan offered to pay them off, I told him I would not accept his money until we married. This made me feel a little bit better about myself because I didn’t want him to think that the only reason or one of the reasons I was with him was because he was a billionaire. I knew he didn’t really think that at all, but it just didn’t feel right to have him paying off my debts. At least not yet.

“I wanted to ask if you have any fantasies,” he asks, watching me as I pour more cereal into my bowl. “You’re hungry, ay?”

“Yeah, I kind of am.” I pause. “You know, I would love an omelette right now.”

He chuckles slightly, “Is that you asking me to make you an omelette?”

“Yes, please. American cheese, cheddar cheese, bacon, toast on the side, and home fries.”

“I thought you said you only wanted cereal this morning.” He raises a single eyebrow and looks at me, a warm smile on his face as he heads towards the fridge.

“Yeah. Well, as I’m eating this cereal, I’m realizing it’s not hitting the spot.” I look sad with my best puppy dog eyes. “But if you don’t want to make me the omelet, that’s fine.”

“I’ll make you an omelet, my love,” he says with a cheeky grin. “Anything for you.”

“You’re too sweet.”

“Don’t get used to it,” he says and for a few seconds I forget that he’s the CEO of one the most successful companies in the country. Right now he’s just my doting boyfriend and I love it.

“Oh, trust me, I won’t, because I kind of knew you before you fell in love with me and you weren’t that sweet.” I tease him.

“I was kinda sweet, no?”

“I’ve worked at your company for years and no I wouldn’t call you sweet.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t know me, know me,” He laughs loudly. “You knew the work me and that colder persona.”

“I guess so,” I say, shaking my head and rolling my eyes. “You were still a playboy that never wanted to get married and—.”

“I mean, I wasn’t really a playboy. Sure, I never wanted to get married, and sure, I wasn’t looking for a relationship.”

“And what are you thinking now?” I ask him softly. There’s a little doubt in my mind. Sometimes I wonder if he regrets being in a relationship with me. Sometimes I wonder if he really does want to marry me.

“You know I love you, Sarah. You know I can’t wait for you to be my wife. You know I want to have babies with you.” He pauses and runs his hands through his hair. “And—.”

“And what?” I ask him.

“I’m just waiting for you to tell me when you’re ready.”

“What?” I almost shout. “To have a baby?” I say, my jaw dropping.

“No,” he chuckles as he opens the fridge and takes out some eggs. ”I’m waiting for you to tell me when you’re ready to get engaged.” He stares at me. You know I want to take you ring shopping.

“You know that it’s too soon,” I say. “I love you and I want to marry you. Of course, I do, but we haven’t even been dating that long, and well, I don’t want anyone to think I’m with you because of your money or anything like that, especially Jackson.”

“Jackson doesn’t think that,” he says, shaking his head. “In fact, Jackson knew I fell for you before I even knew I fell for you.”

“Really?” I say, and then let out a deep sigh. “I mean, I love him, he’s your best friend, and he’s great. I hope that he finds a woman, too, because he’s just so nice, but I’m sure there must be a little part of him that does wonder, ‘Is she with him because of his money?'”

“I don’t think so,” he says, shaking his head. “Jackson’s not the sort of guy to lie about what he thinks. He’s very upfront and direct.”

“I guess,” I’m thoughtful. “I think we should date for a couple more months before we get engaged.” I stare at him and grin. “I can’t lie I am very excited to choose a ring. How many karats did you say I could get?”

“You can get whatever you want, darling, f you want a pink diamond, a ruby diamond, a sapphire.”

“There are ruby diamonds?” I ask him.

He shrugs, “I don’t know, maybe.” He chuckles. “I don’t know that much about gemstones. I have never actually looked at engagement rings before.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that,” I say. “I’m glad that I’m the only woman you’ve ever considered marrying.”

“You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved, aside from my mom.”

“That just seems so weird to me.”

“Why?” He asks. “Don’t you believe in one true love?”

“Yeah. I mean, it always felt like a daydream. I never actually thought that I would be someone’s true love.”

“Well, you’re my true love.” His voice was full of emotion as he pours the egg mix into the frying pan and makes my omelet. He looks at me with such devotion in his eyes that I can feel my heart melting. I don’t know what I did to get so lucky and to deserve him, but I feel blessed. I feel like all my dreams have come true, dreams that I didn’t even dare to dream before.

“You know what, Ethan?”

“What? You want us to go ring shopping today?” 

 I laugh loudly at his words. Who would’ve thought a guy would be more interested in ring shopping than a woman?

“I want to show the world that you’re my woman, mine forever.”

“Really?” I stare at him. “You want everyone to know that you are engaged to me?”

“Yep,” he says. “Maybe it’s because I’m the happiest man in the world, but you know what, Sarah?”

“No, what?”

“I think I’ll be even happier when you’re my wife.”

“Really?” I say, in shock and happiness. I don’t know if he’s read my diary or my thoughts, but he’s saying everything I’ve always wanted to hear.

“Yeah, and then we’ll find a place together.”

“You mean, we’re not going to live in my apartment?”

“Your apartment is not big enough,” he says, shaking his head. “And I already know you don’t want to stay in this one.”

“What? What do you mean?” I ask innocently, though I can feel myself blushing. “I love your apartment.”

“I know you do, but—.”

“But what?”

“I know you that want us to get our own place together.”

“I know. Is that horrible?”

“No, but you know no other woman’s been here, right? You know I haven’t made love to anyone else.”

“I know you say that, and I believe you. Of course, I do. I just want a fresh start for the both of us. I want a place that we both choose, that I can decorate and …”

“What are you saying about my decor?” 

“I mean, it’s fine. It’s great, but it’s just super masculine and dark and not my style. I mean, we can both choose if you want, but nothing black or gray.”

“Honey, you can do whatever you want. I really don’t care.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he says. “If you want to get that penthouse with the maid and …”

I glare at him. “You know that personal ad was a joke, right?”

“So you don’t want to get a penthouse with a maid?”

“I mean, if you want to get a penthouse and also a maid, I’m not going to say no,” I say, laughing. “Hello? Do I look stupid?”

“No, you look like the smartest woman in the world,” he says. “I mean, you chose me, right?”

“I did.” I pull him towards me and kiss him. I can feel his hands on my shoulders, running down my back toward my ass. He squeezes my ass, and I moan. I run my fingers down his chest and breathe in his masculine scent. I love feeling his hard body against mine.

“Someone’s excited to see me and feel me.” I laugh as I feel him growing next to my stomach. 

“Sarah, I must ask you to eat your omelet quickly.” 

“Oh, why?” I say.

“Because if you don’t, it’s going to be cold by the time I finish with you.”

“By the time you finish with me?” I ask giggling.

“You know I want you,” he says, pushing himself into me. His cock is very hard now. “I want you every morning. I want you every hour.”

“You want me morning, noon, and night, don’t you, Mr. Rosser?”

“Yes, I do,” he growls. He turns off the stovetop and picks me up. I start laughing as he carries me to the bedroom.

“What are you doing, Ethan? My breakfast.”

“I told you you needed to eat it fast.”

“But I didn’t even get time to eat it, I—.“

“What’d you want?” he says as he walks into the bedroom and drops me down on the bed. “Do you want me or do you want omelet?” I stare up into his blue eyes and giggle. I pause for a couple of seconds because I don’t want to seem too eager.

“I mean, I guess I don’t have to eat omelet,” I say as I reach over and pull off his shirt.

“Oh?” his eyes glints at me. “Then what will you eat?”

“I can think of a couple of things,” I say as I reach for his boxers and pull them down. His cock stands to attention and I lick my lips.

“I mean, I might not be able to eat, eat, but at least I can suck on something,” I say.

He growls as I kiss my way down his chest towards his cock.

“Fuck,” he says, “you are the sexiest thing alive.”

“Well, if you say so,” I say, giggling.

“Hold on,” he says. I pause and look up at him.

“What?” He reaches down and pulls off my top.

“I just want to see your beautiful breasts,” he says as he pulls me back up and kisses me. I feel his hands reaching for my shorts and pulling them down. “Fucking hot,” he says as he kisses the side of my neck and I feel his fingers on my nipples. I moan slightly as his right hand moves down my body and his fingers play with my belly button. “Oh, you’re just so beautiful, Sarah,” he says, “and I have an idea.”

“What’s your idea?” I ask.

“What about we both eat at the same time.”

“You what?” I stare at him and he winks.

“You know, some 69.”

“Wait, what?”

“Please do not tell me that you’ve never done 69,” he says chuckling. I blush slightly as I look at him.

“Really, Sarah?”

“What? I’m not you, Ethan. I haven’t been around the entire New York City dating scene.”

“I haven’t been around the entire New York City dating scene either, but hey, I don’t mind showing you a move that is going to blow your mind. It’s famous for a reason.”

“Oh, yeah? So how does this work?”

“Well, if you want me to tell you in technical detail, you will sit near my face and your mouth will be near my cock and then we both get to feast.”

“Okay,” I say licking my lips. My stomach feels nervous. I don’t know why, but being with Ethan always sends chills and excitement through my veins.

“I can’t wait to eat you,” he grunts.

“Well, then let’s not keep you waiting,” I say, kissing his lips and then moving my body around. I slide my stomach down towards his cock and he grabs my legs and opens them wide. I feel his breath breathing against my pussy and I tremble slightly. His hands are now on my hips and he brings me back towards his face and I cry out as I feel his tongue on my slit, licking. “Ooh,” I moan slightly as his lips are now sucking on my clit. “Fuck,” I say. I can barely breathe as I feel him licking and sucking. I take a deep breath and open my eyes and run my fingers along his thighs. I stare at his cock and grin as I lean forward and lick the tip of his cock.

“Oh, fuck,” he says against my pussy, and I can feel him growing even harder beneath me. His tongue enters me, and I can feel my body bucking up and down. My mouth moves further down his cock, and I bounce up and down on his face as I simultaneously suck his hardness. This is the sexiest, best thing I have ever done, and I can’t believe I’ve never done it before.

 I can feel his fingers squeezing my ass as he brings me even closer to his face. His tongue is magical up, and I can feel his body tensing as I continue to suck him.

“Oh, shit,” I scream as I feel myself about to come hard and fast, and I pause for a couple of seconds as I have the most intense orgasm. I hear him chuckling as he licks me dry.

“Oh, baby,” he says, “Did you like that?”

“Yes,” I moan as I turn my neck to look back at him, “but you didn’t come yet.”

“That’s okay,” he growls as he spins me around and positions me on top of him. “You can finish me off right now,” he chuckles as he slides my body up along his cock. I grin as I look down at him and he reaches up and plays with my breasts. I grab his cock and position it between my legs, rubbing his tip against my opening. I’m wet and he slides in easily. 

“Oh, fuck yeah, don’t stop.” I gyrate my hips back and forth as I start to bounce up and down slightly. He closes his eyes as he grabs my hips, and I feel him moving me up and down faster and faster. “Oh, fuck yeah. Oh, fuck,” he pauses slightly, and I feel him explode inside of me. I scream as I feel another orgasm hitting me, and he grins as he pulls me down and kisses me, my breasts crushing against his chest. 

 “That was hot.” He grunts.

“Yeah,” I moan and kiss the side of his face.

“Just a little bit better than an omelet, I’m guessing,” he whispers, and I laugh slightly.

“I’m still going to eat that omelet. You know that, right, Ethan?”

“I know, you love to eat.”

“And not just your cock either,” I say, and he bursts out laughing.

“So any fantasies, Sarah?”

“Well, I’ve had one for a long time, but …”

“What is it? You know you can tell me anything.”

“I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be with a cop.”

“Is this your way of asking me if you can fuck a cop?”

“No, stupid. This is my way of telling you I want to role-play.”

“Oh,” he says, his eyes lighting up as he chuckles. “So you want me to be a cop?”

“Yeah, I want you to be the cop, and you’re arresting me, and …” I bite down on my lip.

“Ooh, and what?”

“Let’s just say that the interrogation is a little bit naughty and you handcuff me.”

“Oh, you want me to handcuff you?”

“Yeah. Handcuff me to the bed and have your dirty, dirty way with me.”

“I like the sound of this.”

”I knew you would.”

“Oh, yeah? And why is that?”

“Because you just love to be with me in anyway that you can.”

“You got that right, Sarah,” he says, caressing my face. “You know what?”

“What?” I ask him.

“I’ll be your dirty cop. I’ll be as dirty as you want me to be, but there’s one thing I want from you.”

“What’s that?”

“Well …”

“Oh, my gosh. Don’t tell me you want me to be a sexy nurse.”

“No, that’s not it.”

“A Catholic schoolgirl?”

“No, goofy.”

“Then what? Please do not tell me you want me to be a stripper or something.”

“No, it’s not about role play. I want us to go and look at some places.”

“Huh?” I say, staring at him in confusion.

“I want us to start looking at penthouses.”

“But we’re not ready to move in together yet. I told you, my parents will not be happy, even though I’m in my mid 30s, if I move in with a guy until I’m engaged.”

‘I know,” he says. “I just want to make sure we have the place lined up so that, as soon as we’re engaged, you can move in with me.”

“Wow. You really want me to live with you.”

“Of course. Don’t you want to live with me?”

“Yeah, but …”

“But what? Don’t you get it, Sarah? I love every moment that I’m with you. I love waking up to you. I love going to sleep with you.”

“You just love fucking me.” I giggle.

“Well, of course, I love that, too,” he says. “I love everything about you. You make me laugh, you make me smile, you make me feel like I’ve never felt before in my life. And one more thing.”

“Yeah? What?”

“We should make sure we get a couple of extra bedrooms.”

“Oh?” I say.

“For the kids?”

“You’re ready to start a family?” I ask him, surprised.

“Aren’t you?”

“I mean, maybe in a year or two,” I say, nodding. “I mean, the truth of the matter is, I’m slightly older and who knows if I’ll get pregnant and …”

“Whatever it is we have to do. Hopefully, we can get pregnant naturally. If not, we can try IVF if you want. And I’m always open to adoption. There are lots of kids in the world that need families.”

“You’d adopt?” I ask him in surprise.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I?”

“I just felt like you would want a biological child to carry on the Rosser name.”

“No,” he says. “I think that you and I have enough love that we can be amazing parents to kids that are biologically or not biologically ours. In fact, I’ve always felt like I have so much that, even if we do have biological kids, I would still like to adopt someday, as well.” I stare at him, the love in my heart expanding even more.

“You’re amazing, you know that, Ethan?”

“Really, you think I’m amazing?”

“I do. I fully understand why you were the most eligible bachelor in all of New York City.”

“Really? I thought you said that you couldn’t stand me and you had no idea why I was the most eligible bachelor for all those years.”

“Maybe I was just being a little bit of a hater,” I say, laughing, “but I get it, you’re one of the good guys.” I’m serious for a second. “And I’m really blessed and lucky that we found each other. I don’t take that for granted.”

“I don’t take you for granted either, Sarah. I love you more than anything. I only hope that Jackson can find someone like you one day.”

“What, a hot mess like me or …”

“Maybe he’ll find his own special hot mess,” he grins. “I kind of like being with a hot mess.”

“Are you calling me a hot mess, Ethan Rosser?”

“Whoa,” he says, looking slightly panicked. “I’m just saying what you said and …”

“I’m joking,” I say, laughing. “Do you think Jackson will ever find love?”

“Well, if you would’ve asked me last year if I was going to find love, I would’ve said no. So I think maybe Jackson will.” He looks serious. “I hope he does. He’s been my best friend for a really long time and he’s a great guy.”

“And he’s very good-looking,” I nod.

“Are you telling me you want him?” he looks jealous for a second, and I laugh and shake my head.

“No, goofy. It’s always been you, but I like him a lot. He’s your best friend. I hope he finds love like we have because this is the best feeling in the world.”

“I love you, Sarah Kahan. You are the best mid-thirties slightly hot mess female, I’ve ever met.” He kisses the tip of my nose and then pulls back. “Oh, and one more thing.”

“Yes, darling?”

“I want you to be the first artist we create an album for on our new record label.” He says softly, as my heart pounds. “You’re incredibly talented, and I want you to achieve your dreams. I will do anything I can to help you reach the stars.”

“Are you serious?”

“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my life other than the fact that I love you.” He grabs my hand and kisses it. “I will spend the rest of my days just trying to make you happy. Because when you’re happy, I know I’ve done my job of adoring you right.”

If you enjoyed this book, please leave a review for me here!

The next book in the series is Never Been Tamed and is Jackson’s book. You can preorder it here!

He’s a playboy that’s never been tamed.

I’m the woman that doesn’t care…not even a teensy bit…

I am the dumbest woman alive.

I had a one-night stand with the biggest jerk in New York City, Jackson Pruitt.

The night was passionate, but when he woke me up the following day asking me to cook breakfast, I told him what train station he could walk off.

I never expected to see him again.

But, of course, my luck sucks.

I saw Jackson the next day at my job interview.

The same one I had to take my naughty niece and nephew to.

He assumed I was a crappy mom, and I didn’t correct him.

Suffice it to say, I didn’t get the job.

Not that I wanted to work with him anyway.

So I take a job as a dancer in a club to make some quick money.

Guess who walks in on my first night?

And then tells me off for being a bad mom.

You guessed it..the A-hole himself.

I still have no idea how we wound up in an arrangement that has me questioning my sanity and his.